5 posts tagged “relationships”

I'm a bit bored.

Yeah, sure, there's a million things I could be doing.  I COULD do the rest of the dishes, or clean up the house or go get Little T's laundry up from the basement, or I could even take a shower and start getting ready for work.  But I don't really want to do any of those things,  and I'm starting to get sick so I think I should just sit on my Tush and not do nothin'.  (Including using proper grammar.)

Over the past few months I've taken various pictures on my camera phone, some with the intent to blog about, some just because I saw something cool/funny that I wanted to remember and some... I have no fucking idea why I took them.  Today, I loaded them all up onto Vox and I'm going to have a show and tell. 

Exciting, huh?

...A bit of a warning... you might want to get comfy, 'cause there's a lot of 'em.

02-22-08_2328

Me, with freakishly curly and reddish hair.  (In the Terrorist's bathroom)

05-16-08_0400

Lesley's blood on one of the couch cushions to the Terrorist's couch.  (A couch which I strongly dislike... but we wont get into that.)  Lesley called me one night when I was hanging out with the T and told me she sliced her finger open but she thought she'd be fine and she was going to go out drinking.  (Smart, huh?  Thin out your blood when you have an open wound.)  Anyway, we talked her into stopping by his place so he could play doctor, the couch was unfortunately just an innocent bystander that was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

03-03-08_2024

Lesley and I laying on the benches at Ikea, waiting for her couch.  Fuck, I loved that couch.  It was a little on the soft side but it was so big and cozy and wonderful.

02-26-08_0139

A picture of one of the first cloves of garlic to ever enter my woman-ness (sorry I've been reading romance novels lately)  I believe the keys are there for scale.  I haven't had those key chains in ages.  That was taken a LONG time ago.

03-03-08_2311

I really don't know why this picture was taken.  I believe it was to convince Chris to come hang out with us.  I don't think it worked.

03-08-08_1213

03-08-08_1221

 
These two were taken the morning of Adian's 6th birthday.  (I think it was 6th.)  We had breakfast and then went swimming at the local-ish community center.  It was a lot of fun.  Miss those two terribly.

03-21-08_1257

Something bit me.  A lot.  I don't know what the fuck it was but I woke up with this yucky, itchy rash one morning and it took like two weeks for it to go away.  I found some creepy bug type thing in my room a few days after and was convinced that that was it but I never got around to googling it to find out what the fuck the bug was and if it cause itchy rashes or not.

03-21-08_2306

This picture sucks.  And as stated in the last post I'm lazy and don't feel like fucking with the levels on it to make it clearer.  What it is... two bottles of NightTrain a bit bottle and a little bottle.  The T got the big one, I got the little one, we proceeded to drink them all then had my first drunken sex experience.  I'm sure there was more to it then that, but those are the key points... And I remember the sex well, it was some good lovin'.

03-31-08_1048

My friend Kathrine uses the handle "SexHead" for all her online adventures so I decided to show her that she's not the only one who suffers (is it really suffering though?) from Sexhead.

04-27-08_1748

Back around April or May the T and his roommates had a BBQ.  It was to celebrate the birthday of one of their friends/roommates who had passed away a few months prior.  The T invited me and I did my best to "forget" about it because I'm not good with strangers especially since I wasn't sure where he and I stood regarding relationship stuff and I knew there would probably be a lot of his female friends there many of whom he'd boned at some point in the past.  Anyway, he wouldn't let me forget and Lesley wasn't home so I couldn't get her opinion on how I looked to I took a picture and sent it to Kathrine for her opinion.  This was the picture I sent.

11-10-08_1033

It's a cervix made out of soap!!
 

11-18-08_1528

This flower was at the gate to our front yard.  I'm sure it's dead now but when I took this picture it was still doing well even though it was REALLY freakin cold outside. 

10-28-08_1320

It's a mouse cheese grater!!!   How cool is that?!?!?!

11-12-08_1743

Apparently you can buy vibrators at Freddie's now.  I love the fact that they write "Personal Massager" on it and have a picture of a chick on the cover.  They could at least try to be a bit more discreet.  Any-who, it's good to know that if my "personal massager" breaks I don't have to go far to get another one.

10-28-08_2312

At work we've been having a lot of waste at the end of the night so we've started discounting certain items to $1 after 8pm.  When I got to work after my weekend this is the sign that the 19 year old supervisor created to inform our customers about our deal.  It says  "All Pastries on the top shelf are just $1 today.  (Smiley Face)  Awesome people love pasties."  I was the first one to notice the typo.  We decided to leave the sign up until someone commented on it and it took about a month or so.

12-15-08_1342

I got this awesome dip recipe from my sister a few years ago.  The shit is like crack.  You can't stop.  You know you've had enough and you don't really want anymore but you just can't stop eating it.  After I made it the other day I wanted to try a little sample of it because it had been a year or so since I last had it.  My little sample turned into 1/3 of the plate.  Oops.

Ps.  If you're interested... Take a warm block of cream cheese, blend it with half a bottle of Hickory Smoke BBQ sauce, dice up an onion, a green pepper and a tomato, put the blended stuff down first, layer the other things on it and top with shredded cheese.  It's delicious.  Or just really addicting. 








Okay I think that's it for picture time.  I need to go smoke a cigg and make the kid some lunch then get ready for work even though I really don't want to go because I don't feel good and it's cold and it's going to be busy as all fuck.

I don't even know where to begin. 
Actually I don't feel as though I should even begin until I can talk to the T about stuff.
Hopefully that'll happen tonight or tomorrow night.

It's getting late.  Today is baby momma day, so we can't be late getting to the airport.

Lesley comes home next week.  I can't wait.  We need pho.

My head is throbbing. 
So badly that it kind of makes me want to vomit.

I closed with my manager tonight.  I don't know who's worse.  Her or New Guy.  At least with her I get all the tips and we're generally out of there super early.  She's very much a "go to work to work" type.  Which is cool and all but when it's as slow as it was tonight a little harmless chit chat would make the night go by a bit faster.  Ugh.

Stayed at the Terrorist's house last night.  Got there and was in bed within the hour.  Which is basically what our relationship has been reduced to over the past week or two.  He mentioned it this morning.  How it kind of bothers him that we haven't really gotten to spend much QT together. The comment kind of caught me off guard to be honest.  I don't really know why but it did.  It's not that I hadn't noticed it, it's not that I didn't agree with it, I just hadn't actually admitted it to myself until he vocalized the words.  Because of the whole "incapable of adult relationship's" thing I had tricked myself into thinking that it was just sex that I was missing I didn't even think of the emotional aspect.  Wow, that snuck up and bit me on the ass.  Oh well, life is busy for both of us at the moment and it's only going to get busier.  Which sucks, a lot, but there's not much we can do about it.  Just have to give it time, things will even out after a bit.  I hope.
`
Fuck.  It's 230a.  I was supposed to be in bed by two.
I need to go to bed, I have to be downtown at 10a. 
Fuck, that's in less that eight hours. 

Mornings SUCK!!

I went to the Terrorists house last night knowing that he had an UBER early morning appointment with his attorney (Little T stuff) and that I'd have to get up at 7 or 8am.  I stayed up late with him knowing this, I even got stoned knowing this.  But knowing and doing are two totally different things.  I think my brain finally just started working properly. 

The worst part... we woke up late.  I think he set his alarm wrong and I set the one on my phone 30 mins after the "ABSOLUTE LATEST TIME" he needed to be up.  Oops.

So after running around all crazily and realizing that he might make the max but it would just be the beginning to a cluster fuck of a day I told him I'd give him a ride.  (To Hillsboro)  We slowed down a bit, drank some coffee and he took the time he needed to compose himself. 

We get to Hillsboro, I drop him off in front of Tresca which is a restaurant I applied and interviewed at a few months ago but decided to not take the job because it was way the fuck out in Hillsboro. 

Then I called my sister.  We had one of those amazing conversations that we used to have years ago.  I was on the phone with her for about 2 hours and in the course of those two hours I realized my sister and I are frighteningly similar when it comes to relationships. 

Completely and totally fucked up.

We both have an insane fear of rejection that prevents us from "jumping right in."  It's like we think we can keep it casual forever and risk the potential of getting hurt either because Herbert (general name for the guy in question) doesn't reciprocate our feelings (rejected!) or Herbert does in-fact "like us like that" and then the relationship grows and grows until he finds someone better and then inevitably Herbert rejects us. 

Which is stupid, both Jolene and myself are attractive, intelligent and funny women.  Any guy out there would be lucky to be graced with our affection.  Maybe, hopefully, one day we'll both believe that.

The problem with our casual approach is that you can't stay casual forever.  Things happen.  Shit changes.  Jolene is learning this right now.  She's been seeing this guy since August.  Things have been casual since then and though their's is a very "couple-ish" type of relationship they are not, in fact, a couple.  Now this boy has moved to Vermont, where she is now, visiting him for the week.  Sometime before she leaves she wants to find a way to tell him that she wants more than this casual "thing."  She love's him.  Though she hasn't actually said so, I can totally hear it in her voice. 

I hope things work out for her. 

On a completely unrelated side note.

I'm at Seven Virtues and the barista was talking to a friend of hers who was a customer.  They happened to be standing right in front of the table I'm sitting at and the barista's back was to me.  It has to be said... she has one of the nicest asses I've ever seen.  Seriously,  I couldn't stop myself from staring. 

I was up until 5am, hit the 4 page mark and still am not done with the letter to my dad.  I was going to get up early and continue it but I saved it on Lesley's computer, not my USB drive and she took her computer to school today.  Oh well.

My Week in Bullets...

• Had the conversation with The T (see "2 out of 3 ain't bad...)  It didn't go like planned, mainly because I'm incapable of adult relationships due to my lack of  adult communication skills.  More or less I said that I will probably back off because so much time together is causing "emotions" said "emotions" were thankfully left undefined.
• Proceeded to spend the next 4 nights there.  I don't wanna back off.  I like him, I like hanging out with him, so fuck it.
• Helped him take care of some shit going on with his kid which involved driving to Hillsboro, hanging out in a court house, sitting outside the court house (getting a great tan), doing lots of dishes, providing moral support, drinking beer, partaking in BBQ activities, cleaning his fridge (and defending him to his dad when his dad started to give him shit about me being the one cleaning the fridge... it's SOOO shiny now!), laying on his back roof and getting more of a tan.  Granted these things obviously aren't all exactly related to the Little T crisis but they all happened within the same 48 hour period.
• Fought with Chris.
• Fought with Chris some more.
• Met the Ogre.
• Hung out with the Skinhead (my neighbor)*
  
• Was told by 3 people (Terrorist, Lesley and Nathan) to not sleep with the Skinhead.  (Do ya'll actually think just because I talked to him means I'm going to fuck him???  Common people give me some credit!!)
  
• Didn't see Lesley for awhile.
• Actually went over 24 hours without phone, text or visual contact from Miss. Lesley.
• Started getting along with the 19 year old supervisor.  She's a good kid, if somewhat young and inexperienced.
• My manager has basically told me she loves me and asks me every day if I like my job... I feel like an ass every time I lie to her face and say... "Yes, I do"
• Pissed the 19 year old supervisor off, took the adult route, apologized, promised to work on the thing that pissed her off.
  
• Payed Lesley about 1/2 of what I owe her.
• Payed my mom about 1/440 of what I owe her. 
  
• Decided that I'm going to stop being so cheap and get my coochie waxed.  Yay! For Coochie Waxing!!  I can't wait!