5 posts tagged “train”

Random Unimportant Crap...

Jun 4, 2008
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I've been playing on OkCupid a lot lately.

For the most part it's the same old crap. Just a way to pass the time. My standards are fairly low when it comes to the Internet as a way to meet people. Having said that I am the girl who has never ever (NOT ONCE) dated a person she didn't meet from the Internets. (Unless you count the creepy* guy I fooled around with on the ship who then proceeded to stalk me for 3 weeks.)

I have met some awesome people via the net. Chris, though he and I have had and continue to have our issues, he's a good kid and I love him. OMS was a craigslist boy. Hell, all the guys I had sex with last summer were found via the web. The Terrorist is/was and OkCupid boy.

I don't know where I'm going with this. I think I had a point, but I've forgotten it. The sad thing is I'm completely sober.

It's my Friday! Today was sooooooo much better than yesterday. Nothing special happened but it wasn't a completely shit day either. (I feel a train.)

Tomorrow I need to be productive, which is why immediately after writing this I'm going to go pee and crawl into bed.

While being productive I need to accomplish...

Take shit in closet to Goodwill.
Clean kitchen.
Put Laundry away
Deposit Check
Mail Rent
Pay Lesley
Call/Text Leon
Send Terry, Mah & Kathryn birthday cards. - Wow, I just realized that my three moms (Birthmom, Stepmom and adopted Mom) all have birthdays within a week or two of each other. Bizarre.
Find Job. (Very Minimum: email Paddy's)
Take a fantastically long, wonderful shower (preferably while under the influence of the pot.)

I think that's about it.

Shit... That's kind of a lot of stuff. I need to go to bed!!

*He wasn't that creeepy before we fooled around that mostly came after the foolage. Though, he was a little creepy to start with, but I kind of dig that, I mean, I've been dating a guy I've dubbed "the terrorist" for months now... that's not exactly normal.

Today Sucked. - Updated.

Jun 3, 2008
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I knew it was going to, too.

From the moment I woke up I knew I should have just stayed in bed. Shut the alarm off, roll over and go back to sleep. My insane, idealistic self wouldnt let me do it. Being the freakish optimist I tend to be, I figured it was all in my head and climbed out of bed.

The day just started shitty. I was in a bad mood and tired and yada yada yada. I went out to smoke with Chris and that's when my landlord asked me about the broken screen.* I told him Lesley got locked out. ('Cause I don't think we're supposed to have squatters without his okay.) Then he continued to question me about it. Not that big of a deal... but crappy nonetheless.

The bad vibes then felt it was time for Christopher and I to have a fight. (A big, blowout, kind of fight.) Chris has been staying here for about a month and a half. Now that Shaz is staying here too the house is getting a bit crowded. Somewhere along the line I decided that I would tell Chris that he's gotta find a new place in two weeks or start paying rent. (He's offered before but my theory was that he'd find a place faster if he saved his money to move instead of paying us.) I have a hard time talking with Chris about anything serious because I don't know how he's going to react to things. This is a problem I've always had and will probably continue to have. Anyway, he was fine with the actual two week thing but it moved on to more shit. Deeper more emotionally related and draining shit. That... that was exhausting.

Oh boy did I cry. And cry. And cry. I haven't cried like that in a while. Now, in all fairness it wasn't just because of the argument he and I got into, there was just a lot of built up shit in my head and this was the catalyst that set me off.

(I hear a train.)

So yeah, I cried and cried then showered then cried some more. By then it was time for me to stop the self pity train and get ready because the Terrorist was going to be stopping by.

We ended up going up to his place where we ended up having couch sex. Then the condom broke. Fuck. Big fuck. Big, double, shit, goddamn, ahhhhhhhh, FUCK!!! He and I have deduced that because my girly parts are so fucked up the actual possibility of me being fertile is probably pretty fucking low.

Which is true.. but I'm still a bit worried and will be until I start bleeding.

The bad vibes then followed me to work. Though nothing big happened there were a bunch of little irritating things such as...

Got there late... And for no reason 'cause I left the Terrorist's house 5 mins before I normally leave mine.
The shuttle I was on going to the airport almost went off the road.
I bent 3 nails all at once. (I bent them WAY down toward the nail bed... it hurt!!)
When I got there barely anything was done
There were more but my brain is tired and remembering hurts.

It's just been a crappy day. I hope tomorrow goes better.

Which, if we're being technical and saying that "today" is June 2nd and "tomorrow" is June 3rd then tomorrow is going much better. So far on June 3rd I've... (I'm liking lists tonight)

I got home to Lesley passed out but in the kitchen was a plate wrapped in a paper-towel with a note that said "EAT ME" on it. Inside... Blueberry Pancakes!!
I found out the name of the Artist for this song I LOVE but couldn't for the life of me figure out who did it! I figured it out!!!
Chris found a HUGE, really really nice monitor on his walk home tonight. And... IT WORKS!! (Granted that doesn't really affect me other than being envious as all hell I think it's some sort of proof that the cosmos are swinging in the direction of good things.)
On the way home from work I was behind a car with a bumper sticker that said "I'm only speeding because I really have to POOP."

*Shaz got locked out the other night. Lesley was at the boy I haven't given a nickname to yet's house and I was at the Terrorists place so Shaz broke the screen and climbed in the window.

Nothing important...

May 11, 2008
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I hear a train.

I like living next to trains.
Actually, I wish they were just a little bit closer.

That's all.

Oh yeah... and... I'm STARVING.

I don't think I've eaten today. And there's nothing to eat here. Well at least nothing that doesn't require some sort of semi-intensive preparation.

Oh my god... I could totally go for taco's from the taco stand by Chris's old apartment right now.
That sounds delicious.

I'm here... Now what?

Feb 1, 2008
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I think I'm having a bit of a quarter life crisis.

For the past 6 months I've been focusing on getting to Portland. I've gotta get to Portland. I've gotta get to Portland. Can't stand Maine, gotta get to Portland.

Now that I'm here I'm kind of freaking out.

I don't have much money so I have to start working soon. And with every fiber of my being I don't want to go back to the Olive Garden but it's the smart thing to do. That way I can write off my trip, have a job and still have insurance.

Lesley's mom wants her to go to Singapore in March and Lesley asked me if I wanted to go. I'd love to go but I don't have the money so Lesley's gonna see if she can get me a free ticket which would be AWESOME. That's another reason why I should go back to the Olive Garden. Because I don't care if I just quit there. I could come back from Singapore and find another job.

Then there's the question of whether or not I want to stay in Portland. And by stay I mean work here or work on the train. I would kind of like to hang out here for a bit. Chill out, make some friends, and just BE in Portland. But I also want the money that working on the train would bring.

I've made a new friend. I fear that this friend is going to turn into a long term commitment and we all know how I handle those. Well, the commitment itself isn't that bad it's more the idea of it that FREAKS ME THE FUCK OUT. The friend... his name is Hamish. He's a 6 month old cocker spaniel and I'm growing more in love with him everyday. He belongs to Elaine and her husband but they have decided that they can't handle two hyper-active kids a cat and a puppy. (Who could?) Anyway they've been looking for someone to take him and Lesley has mentioned bringing him with us but I didn't really take her seriously until I met him. He's so fucking great. Dumb as shit. But adorable and lovable as all hell. They got him from a mall pet-store so I'm sure he's been in-bred about a thousand times at one of those puppy farms which would explain why he's so stupid.

A dog. Wow. Total lifestyle change. After Lucifer I decided against pets because they're too much work. Cat's not much so but dogs... they're basically like having a kid that poops outside. I don't have the lifestyle for a dog. I move around to much, I like being free to go and do and move and live wherever I want to.

But I love this dog.

I think I could handle it. If Lesley will help me out and take over dog custody for a few weeks at a time, should I decide to work on the train.

Monday.

Monday I'm going to go to the Olive Garden. I'm going to hate it and I'll probably vomit in my mouth a little bit even as I'm smiling at the GM, but I'm going to go. And I'm going to convince them that I've got the HOSPITALIANO! that they want and I'm everything they could ever desire in a server. Then, as soon as I find out about Singapore I'm going to start looking for another job.

Train, no train. We'll decide on that later.

Then there's the Terrorist. Which really has nothing to do with my pseudo mid-life crisis but I feel bad. I was supposed to call him today to hang out but I never did. Why didn't I? I don't fucking know. Now it's too late, well no it's not but I'm going to hang out with Lesley at her work and let her feed me free food. And that's going to last until 12ish so yeah, I guess it is too late. I think, as much as I want to meet him I need to relax about it. I JUST got back. He's a cool cat. He knows I've got stuff going on and though I do want to hang out with him I have other obligations... such as finding a dog friendly apartment.

Fuck.